“I was talking politely, however, the other one was rude..so I decided to mirror the other. “
It has often happened with me that I may be in a good mood, projecting out a cheer and good vibes to the people I am interacting with. However, if an individual fails to reciprocate the same kind of vibes, I lose my element.
Today (the day I am writing this blog) I felt a giddy high.
I was enthusiastic, energetic and a bit like Preity Zinta when she realises she’s in love with SRK in the movie Kal Ho Na Ho.
I think, using smileys while communicating virtually with people is like keeping a smile when we talk to people in the real world. One appears more courteous to the other person. Today was using lots of smileys kind of a day.
Speaking cheerfully to a friend over WhatsApp, I felt that their response was a bit cold. My ship of giddiness started sinking in the waters of another person’s perceived cold attitude.
Fortunately, Shri Krishna within me reminded me that how the other person behaves or talks to me need not affect my mood and cheer.
Often in the past, I have found myself despondent over the expectation (darn you, expectations) that people will mirror my cheer and enthusiasm. Also, at other times I expect (darn you, again) that others should not reflect my weariness, anger, ego and other lower vibrational states.
So totally unfair on other people!
Take the friend’s case whom I was speaking to in the morning. Perhaps the friend had just:
- woken up,
- was sleepy,
- or had a bad dream,
- or was served with tinde kee sabzi in breakfast,
- or noticed the redundancy of fleets on Twitter,
- or accidentally saw a tik-tok and was looking for Patanjali Ganga Jal eyedrops to purify their eyes?
And I did not ask.
Even if nothing untoward was up in their life, perhaps they just weren’t feeling up to the conversation and the day as I was. After all, we all have our personal waxing and waning phases, fluctuations like the Moon.
Let no self-help guru, coach, influencer fool you into thinking that everyone has it together every day.
There is always something up the sleeve of the universe to remind you: everything is impermanent.
Allowing your mood to be dictated by another’s response is so comically imbecile!
I now laugh at my younger self for all the times I took life, myself and others too seriously.
Victor E Frankl, a holocaust survivor, in his path-breaking book called Man’s Search For Meaning says (paraphrasing),
“All kinds of freedom can be taken away from you but your freedom of attitude to a situation.”
Precious words of wisdom from someone who managed to keep himself sane during an extremely challenging life situation; learned from it and helped so many people once he was free.
Sadhguru says that it’s a form of slavery to be dependent upon another person for your happiness. It is like, as he says, you’ve given the remote control of your life to another person. They can press a specific button, and that can elicit a particular response from you–Not a right way to exist for sure.
I’m so happy I chose not to feel bothered by the friend’s lack of my ‘perceived’ cheer when I spoke to them in the morning. I made a decision that I’m gonna make the most of the happy vibe given by Shri Krishna (universe) today and spread that.
Such kind of healthy behaviour has not been a constant in my life, frankly. I can owe a lot of it to developing my inner power and strengthening my best parts within through specific practices and tools.
Wish to know more about tools to increase personal power?
Wait for the next week’s blog!
Until then, thank you so much for staying with me until the end of the blog. If you liked this piece, please do let me know and be a kind soul and share it with others.
Joy, harmony and peace.