The League of Shadows, a deranged, self-righteous criminal organization, has just burned down the Wayne mansion. Bruce tries resisting the criminals, but how much can he do against so many of his former ‘friends’ without his suit or preparation. They’d caught him off guard by suddenly appearing at his birthday party. Bruce is knocked out on being hit by a log-like portion from the collapsing ceiling. In comes his old butler Alfred to save the day and his life!

Alfred manages to bring Bruce back to consciousness. Also, he inspires him to lift the ‘bloody log off his body’ and rescue himself from the raging fire. As they somehow make their way down to the Bat cave, Bruce laments the burning down of the Wayne manor and, in turn, his family’s generation’s worth of legacy.

Alfred had always been skeptical of Bruce’s belief in becoming a costumed vigilante to help people. Here his former ‘batchmates’ came and destroyed the house. Bruce is shattered and in a self-blame mode. Right before this drama, Bruce and Alfred had also argued. Alfred felt Bruce was being over-the-top and risking his life and that of others via his Batman avatar. Bruce must have fully been expecting Alfred to tell him off.

But what does Alfred do?

He repeats the iconic line, ‘Why do we fall, sir?’ while reminding Bruce that Wayne legacy is more than bricks and mortar.

Bruce smiles weakly and says, ‘You still haven’t given up on me?’

Alfred responds, ‘Never.’

TRY AGAIN

Have you ever noticed how family and friends sometimes react when we make a mistake?

Sometimes, something as innocuous as utensils or items dropping from one’s hand can elicit a response like, ‘tod do, gira do.’ Or a sarcastic jibe like, ‘ayee shabaash, bohot badiya, jeeyo!’

I’ll admit I have done so as well. Admittedly, it is fun. Sorry, it just is.

Depending on the kind of connection we have with someone else, it may be okay to banter when they’ve made a mistake. However, when it comes to errors more significant than dropping some utensils, we can learn from Alfred’s example.

There have been a few instances in my life where I have felt completely shattered and broken. I have gone into self-blame mode, unable to forgive myself for what I considered to be grave errors on my part.

I have been blessed to have Alfred-like people in my own life to remind me that it is okay to fall down and inspire me to pick myself up again. Such advice acts like a propellant to try and improve on my ‘missed-take’ and be better in my life journey ahead.

Once we have made an error, often there is little we can do to fix it.

Take the case of a shattered handicraft. You can either buy a new one or dump the broken pieces in the trash.

You can not do anything else, can you?

Well, the Japanese have another thing to say.

KINTSUGI

You may have heard of this traditional Japanese art form called Kintsugi or Kintsukuroi. Broken pottery pieces are repaired using lacquer mixed with powdered gold, silver, or platinum.

Kintsugi signifies that rather than hiding our imperfections, we make something unique and beautiful out of it.

Similarly, another Japanese aesthetic called ‘Wabi-Sabi’ speaks of embracing beauty in imperfection.

We all err.

We all make boo-boos.

No one is bereft of this ‘blessing.’

Kintsugi teaches us that even out of our broken pieces, we can make something beautiful. Perhaps more beautiful than before.

LASSO WAY

I am going to use another pop culture reference. It’s not as known as Batman, but one particular show has impacted my life journey beautifully.

In the Apple TV show Ted Lasso, Ted hires an assistant coach called, ‘Beard.’ It is revealed later on in the show that Beard has had a delinquent past. However, Ted gives him a second and a third chance. Beard turns out to be a better human than before and even an asset for Ted Lasso’s life journey.

Life is not like cinema or TV shows. Life is much more profound. Life is much more nuanced.

But popular culture, cinema, TV, music, etc., mirrors our society. Learning and picking good things from the media is a plus.

As far as my life experience goes, I have rarely seen people responding well to being treated harshly or criticism. If I have made an error, kind guidance, and upliftment will enable me to respond better and improve.

A harsh critique will only make me feel more shattered. This is a lesson that I am still learning and picking up from good media content, as mentioned above, and wise friends and teachers. I too have been guilty of using criticism as a ‘tool’ to admonish someone who has made an error.

A WORD OF CAUTION

As I write this post, I am aware and mindful that life is never one size fits all. Life is subjective. We must have a different formula for every person and situation.

The Alfred Way or the Lasso Way may apply in our daily dealings. It may be helpful within close relationships.

But is it universally applicable?

Not really.

And why, where, and how the lasso and Alfred way are not universally applicable, we will discuss in my next piece. Next time, we will discuss the ‘Krishna way’.

Thank you so much for reading until the end.

Let me know your thoughts on the ideas shared by me.

Have you encountered your own Alfreds and Ted Lassos in your life?

Most Importantly, I hope we all can be Alfred and Lasso to uplift another human when they’re down.

Kushagra